Longer School Day in Motion (Satire) (by Tommy Wilde '21)

Tommy Wilde '21
Based on the 100% accurate answers of a recent poll given to completely real students, the school has made the extremely intelligent decision to adjust the weekly schedule.
It's no surprise to anyone that teenagers love nothing more than spending hours in a classroom learning about subjects they are truly passionate about. With this in mind, we are certain everyone will be pleased to learn that in-school learning will now be five days a week for nine hours a day. State mandates such as social distancing and the wearing of masks will still be enforced to ensure no one will enjoy being there too much. This will help greatly to promote a dull and effective learning environment. We wish everyone the best of luck in this remaining quarter and we cannot wait to see you all here at 4:30 each morning after spring break. This is what you wanted, right? 

    • Photo: IDK, I googled “longer school day” (Google)

St. Francis High School

2130 W. Roosevelt Road, Wheaton, IL 60187
Phone (630) 668-5800
Fax (630) 668-5893